So, I've been thinking a lot today about God's faithfulness. I mean, I prayed about getting into this South Africa program for months and months, and now here I am. He is so good and I feel like I've just spent the past 24 hours praising Him for allowing this all to happen.
But then I started thinking about how often I don't remember God's faithfulness. There were many, many times this past year at APU that I wondered what He was doing. The past few months with this whole Raynaud's thing, and now with the doctors questioning if it's Lupus...I still don't fully understand that whole thing, but am learning more and more to just surrender. That God is faithful and He loves us.
I am in San Clemente this weekend. Possibly the best beach in the world and one of the cutest cities on the coast. My family went to the San Juan Capistrano mission today and there were the most beautiful flowers. Everywhere. It was like heaven. And then we came back to our condo, and the ocean was right there. And then it just hit me: God created all of it. From the hugest ocean to the tiniest flower...He created everything. And not only did He create it, but He imagined it. Can you imagine being able to take credit for thinking of the ocean??? He imagined all of it and perfected all of it. Praise God for His creativity and beauty.
I know this is sort of all over the place, but I guess I just realized today that if God loves us enough to create the idea of beauty, He must love us enough to fulfill all His promises. To be faithful when we call on Him and guide us on the path we're on. I want to remember His faithfulness more often and learn how to be that faithful to Him.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Friday, June 19, 2009
SOUTH AFRICA!
Okay, so just in case anyone reading this doesn't know, I'm going to give a little background information....
When I was first looking into APU while I was applying to colleges, I heard that they had a study abroad program in South Africa. Immediately, I was intrigued. I had never even heard of a school doing that before. And then when I went to APU in the fall, I began to look more and more into it. Tyler went in September and seeing his pictures of all the kids and townships out there...it just broke my heart. Literally. There were multiple occasions where I was in chapel or class and just started sobbing, picturing these kids and their lives. God was softening my heart towards this country and it's people.
So, I began praying about going on the study abroad trip in Spring 2010. That's always when I imagined I would study abroad and academically, it worked out the best for me. I went to my academic advisor to make sure it would work with my classes/major, etc. And looking back, I think subconsciouly I was sort of testing God. Ya know, like if it all worked out then it's His plan but if it doesn't, then maybe it wasn't mean to be. Which the Bible blatantly says not to do, but I was pretty scared at the thought of spending 4 months in this country. But, because the Lord is SO good, everything worked out perfectly. A lot of times, studying abroad puts students behind a little bit academically but my advisor and I worked out the next few semesters so that I was able to save classes for the trip. I would be able to take 17 units and only 3 of them will be extra credit. The rest would actually count towards my major or they are general ed classes. Thank you, God!
So then, I just had to apply. I spent months working on my application and writing my essays. I wanted every word to just be absolutely perfect. And when I went to go turn it in to the study abroad office, I nearly felt sick with exitement and anxiety. I have never felt God put something this much on my heart. It was so ridiculous, there was no possible way I could ignore it. I really felt like this trip was something I had to do. So I turned the application in a few weeks before school got out and....drum roll please....
I GOT ACCEPTED!!!!!
I just got the email today. It's actually really funny because I haven't checked my school email since we got out for summer. I mean, why would I, right? :) But today--totally out of the blue--I decide to check it. And there was my acceptance email. And the crazy part is....they had only sent the email ONE HOUR before I checked it. I mean, maybe that's not a big deal to anyone else but I just think that's such a God thing. I've been praying about this since September and have gone through a LOT of ups and downs with it. So it was such a blessing that God would allow me to find out as soon as I possibly could.
And now, I'm just completely giddy about the whole thing. The adventure of it all totally thrills and terrifys me but I feel so at peace about this! I know this is where I'm supposed to be and when I'm supposed to go. I'm just so thankful that the Lord orchestrated it perfectly! So if you all could start your prayers for me now, I would really appreciate it! :) I know I'll get home sick and struggle with culture shock and be totally, utterly overwhelmed but at the same time, so excited to be in the place God has called me to.
I once heard someone say, "There's something so powerful about dialing into the sweet spot of what God has designed you for. There's nothing like it" I couldn't agree more and feel like this is something God designed for me. I absolutely cannot wait.
When I was first looking into APU while I was applying to colleges, I heard that they had a study abroad program in South Africa. Immediately, I was intrigued. I had never even heard of a school doing that before. And then when I went to APU in the fall, I began to look more and more into it. Tyler went in September and seeing his pictures of all the kids and townships out there...it just broke my heart. Literally. There were multiple occasions where I was in chapel or class and just started sobbing, picturing these kids and their lives. God was softening my heart towards this country and it's people.
So, I began praying about going on the study abroad trip in Spring 2010. That's always when I imagined I would study abroad and academically, it worked out the best for me. I went to my academic advisor to make sure it would work with my classes/major, etc. And looking back, I think subconsciouly I was sort of testing God. Ya know, like if it all worked out then it's His plan but if it doesn't, then maybe it wasn't mean to be. Which the Bible blatantly says not to do, but I was pretty scared at the thought of spending 4 months in this country. But, because the Lord is SO good, everything worked out perfectly. A lot of times, studying abroad puts students behind a little bit academically but my advisor and I worked out the next few semesters so that I was able to save classes for the trip. I would be able to take 17 units and only 3 of them will be extra credit. The rest would actually count towards my major or they are general ed classes. Thank you, God!
So then, I just had to apply. I spent months working on my application and writing my essays. I wanted every word to just be absolutely perfect. And when I went to go turn it in to the study abroad office, I nearly felt sick with exitement and anxiety. I have never felt God put something this much on my heart. It was so ridiculous, there was no possible way I could ignore it. I really felt like this trip was something I had to do. So I turned the application in a few weeks before school got out and....drum roll please....
I GOT ACCEPTED!!!!!
I just got the email today. It's actually really funny because I haven't checked my school email since we got out for summer. I mean, why would I, right? :) But today--totally out of the blue--I decide to check it. And there was my acceptance email. And the crazy part is....they had only sent the email ONE HOUR before I checked it. I mean, maybe that's not a big deal to anyone else but I just think that's such a God thing. I've been praying about this since September and have gone through a LOT of ups and downs with it. So it was such a blessing that God would allow me to find out as soon as I possibly could.
And now, I'm just completely giddy about the whole thing. The adventure of it all totally thrills and terrifys me but I feel so at peace about this! I know this is where I'm supposed to be and when I'm supposed to go. I'm just so thankful that the Lord orchestrated it perfectly! So if you all could start your prayers for me now, I would really appreciate it! :) I know I'll get home sick and struggle with culture shock and be totally, utterly overwhelmed but at the same time, so excited to be in the place God has called me to.
I once heard someone say, "There's something so powerful about dialing into the sweet spot of what God has designed you for. There's nothing like it" I couldn't agree more and feel like this is something God designed for me. I absolutely cannot wait.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Dodgers & Break Dancing
Life has been pretty good lately. I went to a Dodgers game last night with Katie Hill and our dads...super fun!!! And they won in extra innings. Way to go, Dodgers. It's funny because, I wouldn't say I'm a huge Dodger fan. I can't watch baseball on TV for more than like 15 minutes because I just get SO BORED of it (Sorry if anyone reading this is a huge baseball fan). But when you're there in the crowd and the game is right in front of you, it suddenly becomes REALLY exciting! Haha. I mean, I had my Dodger shirt on and was booing the other team, then cheering on our team. I didn't even know what was going on half the time but you just totally get caught up in the excitement of it all! I love it. Even though I'm not the most athletic person ever, I really enjoy watching sports. Especially basketball and soccer. So much fun.
Tonight, I hung out with Alli and Melody, who are WAY cooler than I was in high school. :) They're hilarious and Melody is going to teach me some break dance moves. Yes, you read that correctly. Break dance moves. Like said...way cooler than me.
And now I'm just killing time, waiting for it to be a decent hour before I can call Tyler. Oh, time change.
And if anyone is looking for some new songs, here are my current favorites: "Then" by Brad Paisley, "1234" by Plain White T's, and "Kiss a Girl" by Keith Urban. Super cute and fun summer songs. :)
Tonight, I hung out with Alli and Melody, who are WAY cooler than I was in high school. :) They're hilarious and Melody is going to teach me some break dance moves. Yes, you read that correctly. Break dance moves. Like said...way cooler than me.
And now I'm just killing time, waiting for it to be a decent hour before I can call Tyler. Oh, time change.
And if anyone is looking for some new songs, here are my current favorites: "Then" by Brad Paisley, "1234" by Plain White T's, and "Kiss a Girl" by Keith Urban. Super cute and fun summer songs. :)
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Catch up
I think I'm finally ready to blog. Haha it's only a week after I got home... :)
To sum it up, I would honestly have to say that my trip to England was the best two weeks of my life. I can't remember a time in my life when I felt happier. It couldn't have been more perfect and that was completely God's blessing. We got to spend a day (aka: my 19th birthday) in Paris...definitely the most romantic, amazing day ever. It was perfect weather, about 80 degrees, and even though we were only there for a day, we got to do a lot! We went to the Arc de Triomphe, had a picnic at the Eiffel Tower, went to Luxembourg Gardens, saw the Louve, and then ended with Notre Dame. And of course, tons of walking and eating in between all of that. :)
We also went into London for two days. The first day, we got to see St. Paul's Cathedral and go inside of it. We walked up all 300 stairs! I was SO tired, so Tyler rewarded me with ic
e cream. Haha. Then walked along the Thames River and saw the London Eye and Big Ben/Parliament. From there, it was Westminster Abbey, Buckingham Palace, Hyde Park, and dinner at a pub! By the way, I had my first drink while I was over there. Let's just say I'm not a big fan of wine or beer yet...maybe 21 is a magic number where you instantly like alcohol??? Tyler recommended some fruity, sugary drink that had about 2% alcohol...that was the winner. :) Haha. The second day in London, we got a proper English breakfast at a cafe right on the Thames River and then....SHOPPING!!! I got to see all the main shopping areas, like Piccadilly Circus, Oxford Circus (don't know why they're all circuses...) and Covent Garden. Then we saw Phantom o
f the Opera at Her Majesty's Theater....AMAZING! I was just in awe the entire time. I loved it. And then we walked along the Thames River again, to see everything lit up at night. Gorgeous.
And the other days, we stayed in Watford mostly, just seeing Tyler's life. It was so great seeing Soul Surivor (his church) and meeting all his friends. Finally being able to put faces/personalities to names. It was also so fun to finally go to all the places I've seen pictures of, like his house or Presence (his favorite coffee shop) or "into town". I loved just getting to live normal life with him again for a bit. Something that's so hard about long-distance is that normalcies get eliminated. Conversations are so rare and precious that the everyday things often get lost. So it was great to be able to just catch a movie or make dinner together. I wish I could s
ay more about all of it. I honestly feel like I have so much to say about my trip that I either have to say none of it or all of it. One of those "one story leads to another" kind of things. I'm sure random stories will come up in future blogs. But I will say that it was fun, romantic, and growing. What more could you ask for?
And now I'm home. This past week, I've been going through this like...post-trip depression kind of thing. Haha. That sounds so intense but I think everyone kind of goes through it after a big trip. It's hard to come back to normal life after an adventure in a foreign place. Not to mention the jet-lag factor. I slept for 10 hours last night though, so I think I finally got over that. It's just been weird being home. I felt that way after going to school though, and I got past it. Plus, Tyler comes home in less than 6 weeks!! And it's home for good!!!! So that's exciting.
In other news, God kind of kicked my butt in church today. (Side note: I had an amazing encounter with the Spirit while in England but I still haven't totally processed that...so that's still to come). I went to Gratis and it was so good to see people I haven't seen in awhile. Even though I haven't been going there lately, it's still home and it felt like home when I went back. But Mark was talking about the Sermon on the Mount and was challenging us to bear good fruit, fruit that Christ would want us to bear. And he said "Are more people who were unloved, loved because of you?" And in that moment, all the unloved people I chose not to love went through my head. All the "nerds" who I was too embarrassed to be kind to, all the homeless men and women who I've just passed without even smiling at, all those people at my school who come from broken homes....all the people who need to be loved and I've refused. I want to love people more. And then, Mark started talking about heaven and what "kind of people" God allows through the gates. He said "You can't be a person who doesn't care about the will of God and end up in a place that's all about the will of God." And isn't the will of God essentially all about love? To love Him and love each other? I think it's something we all need to work on. To unconditionally love those around us, even the unloved. Especially the unloved.
Wow. Lots of thoughts tonight. I think it's because I haven't done this in awhile. And catching you all up on my life. I say "you all" as in the 4 people who actually know about this blog. Hmm maybe it's time I make it public. Same old self doubt gets in the way, but what's life without a few risks, right?
P.S. I'm still figuring out this whole picture thing on here....I'll try to get better at it!
P.P.S. I bought orange shoes yesterday and a bright yellow shirt the day before that. I am kind of bored with my clothes and wanted to change it up. Wore the shoes today....LOVE them. :)
To sum it up, I would honestly have to say that my trip to England was the best two weeks of my life. I can't remember a time in my life when I felt happier. It couldn't have been more perfect and that was completely God's blessing. We got to spend a day (aka: my 19th birthday) in Paris...definitely the most romantic, amazing day ever. It was perfect weather, about 80 degrees, and even though we were only there for a day, we got to do a lot! We went to the Arc de Triomphe, had a picnic at the Eiffel Tower, went to Luxembourg Gardens, saw the Louve, and then ended with Notre Dame. And of course, tons of walking and eating in between all of that. :)
We also went into London for two days. The first day, we got to see St. Paul's Cathedral and go inside of it. We walked up all 300 stairs! I was SO tired, so Tyler rewarded me with ic
e cream. Haha. Then walked along the Thames River and saw the London Eye and Big Ben/Parliament. From there, it was Westminster Abbey, Buckingham Palace, Hyde Park, and dinner at a pub! By the way, I had my first drink while I was over there. Let's just say I'm not a big fan of wine or beer yet...maybe 21 is a magic number where you instantly like alcohol??? Tyler recommended some fruity, sugary drink that had about 2% alcohol...that was the winner. :) Haha. The second day in London, we got a proper English breakfast at a cafe right on the Thames River and then....SHOPPING!!! I got to see all the main shopping areas, like Piccadilly Circus, Oxford Circus (don't know why they're all circuses...) and Covent Garden. Then we saw Phantom o
f the Opera at Her Majesty's Theater....AMAZING! I was just in awe the entire time. I loved it. And then we walked along the Thames River again, to see everything lit up at night. Gorgeous.And the other days, we stayed in Watford mostly, just seeing Tyler's life. It was so great seeing Soul Surivor (his church) and meeting all his friends. Finally being able to put faces/personalities to names. It was also so fun to finally go to all the places I've seen pictures of, like his house or Presence (his favorite coffee shop) or "into town". I loved just getting to live normal life with him again for a bit. Something that's so hard about long-distance is that normalcies get eliminated. Conversations are so rare and precious that the everyday things often get lost. So it was great to be able to just catch a movie or make dinner together. I wish I could s
ay more about all of it. I honestly feel like I have so much to say about my trip that I either have to say none of it or all of it. One of those "one story leads to another" kind of things. I'm sure random stories will come up in future blogs. But I will say that it was fun, romantic, and growing. What more could you ask for?And now I'm home. This past week, I've been going through this like...post-trip depression kind of thing. Haha. That sounds so intense but I think everyone kind of goes through it after a big trip. It's hard to come back to normal life after an adventure in a foreign place. Not to mention the jet-lag factor. I slept for 10 hours last night though, so I think I finally got over that. It's just been weird being home. I felt that way after going to school though, and I got past it. Plus, Tyler comes home in less than 6 weeks!! And it's home for good!!!! So that's exciting.
In other news, God kind of kicked my butt in church today. (Side note: I had an amazing encounter with the Spirit while in England but I still haven't totally processed that...so that's still to come). I went to Gratis and it was so good to see people I haven't seen in awhile. Even though I haven't been going there lately, it's still home and it felt like home when I went back. But Mark was talking about the Sermon on the Mount and was challenging us to bear good fruit, fruit that Christ would want us to bear. And he said "Are more people who were unloved, loved because of you?" And in that moment, all the unloved people I chose not to love went through my head. All the "nerds" who I was too embarrassed to be kind to, all the homeless men and women who I've just passed without even smiling at, all those people at my school who come from broken homes....all the people who need to be loved and I've refused. I want to love people more. And then, Mark started talking about heaven and what "kind of people" God allows through the gates. He said "You can't be a person who doesn't care about the will of God and end up in a place that's all about the will of God." And isn't the will of God essentially all about love? To love Him and love each other? I think it's something we all need to work on. To unconditionally love those around us, even the unloved. Especially the unloved.
Wow. Lots of thoughts tonight. I think it's because I haven't done this in awhile. And catching you all up on my life. I say "you all" as in the 4 people who actually know about this blog. Hmm maybe it's time I make it public. Same old self doubt gets in the way, but what's life without a few risks, right?
P.S. I'm still figuring out this whole picture thing on here....I'll try to get better at it!
P.P.S. I bought orange shoes yesterday and a bright yellow shirt the day before that. I am kind of bored with my clothes and wanted to change it up. Wore the shoes today....LOVE them. :)
Monday, June 8, 2009
Home
So, thanks to jet lag, here I am awake at 7am. I suppose it was a little naive to set my alarm for 10:30am. :)
But I'm back! I'm home in my own bed after my whirlwind of adventures through Europe. I still can't believe it happened. Honestly, now that I'm home and back in my normal life, it almost feels like it didn't happen. Has anyone else felt that way about a trip or big event in their lives? You look forward to it and build it up for months, then it happens, and then all of the sudden it's over. Just like that. My two week stay over there felt like 3 days. It went by SO FAST. It was truly incredible though. My mom asked me last night how my trip compared to my expectations on a scale from 1-10. I chose 15.
It could not have been better. I got to see two of the most beautiful cities in the entire world and visit some very famous icons. I got to explore little, quaint cities in England. I got to spend two weeks with Tyler and have a great time of fun, romance, and growth. It was just absolutely amazing. I'm not sure my mind is fully working right now for me to explain it. But it was just....the best. I'll have to try to blog more about it this week as I process it all. God did some amazing things I want to write about but, again, maybe after a few days. For now, I think I'll try to go back to sleep and hopefully utilize that 10:30 alarm.
But I'm back! I'm home in my own bed after my whirlwind of adventures through Europe. I still can't believe it happened. Honestly, now that I'm home and back in my normal life, it almost feels like it didn't happen. Has anyone else felt that way about a trip or big event in their lives? You look forward to it and build it up for months, then it happens, and then all of the sudden it's over. Just like that. My two week stay over there felt like 3 days. It went by SO FAST. It was truly incredible though. My mom asked me last night how my trip compared to my expectations on a scale from 1-10. I chose 15.
It could not have been better. I got to see two of the most beautiful cities in the entire world and visit some very famous icons. I got to explore little, quaint cities in England. I got to spend two weeks with Tyler and have a great time of fun, romance, and growth. It was just absolutely amazing. I'm not sure my mind is fully working right now for me to explain it. But it was just....the best. I'll have to try to blog more about it this week as I process it all. God did some amazing things I want to write about but, again, maybe after a few days. For now, I think I'll try to go back to sleep and hopefully utilize that 10:30 alarm.
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